At this very moment, it’s two minutes before 3:00AM.
And I promise you people, I had a plan.
See, I keep this Excel file and one of the tabs I titled, “Progress Report” and up until now, I was knocking out 3K + words a day! 4K+ on one day.
What was so fantastic about it was that I usually knock out that many words per day after being about 30K words in.
But you know what?
Since the beginning, my six sense of writing was trying to warn me, that I was moving too fast. Because stories weave into reality long after you stop typing for the day. And, 1k words to 2k words a day for the first 30k of the novel, gives my mind time to recover and move forward, recover, move forward, and so and so on.
Because THAT’S the process!!!!
See.. the beginning of the novel is the foundation… and it takes a lot more time and attention to lay the foundation.
And so I went too fast, and got lost in this MESS I wrote! I mean, really, if I bore myself, then I have to slash it, cut it, delete it because really, just like my men, I’m picky about my prose. Plus, I’m tough on myself. I’ll quickly tell myself, what you just wrote sucked–ALL of it! And if you don’t want to read it-who would?
And then I’ll end with– NOW FIX IT.
So, right now, it’s 3:04AM and I have to force myself to stop fixing this plot.
Here’s what happened… I was forcing myself to WRITE… forcing my creative mind through the world too fast. And the yarn I spun came out amateurish. The dialog was contrived and choppy. Characters were talking and moving in circles and not getting anywhere because they had no clear purpose, plus they were all showing up too soon.
I love my last post on here. It centered me, got me back on track. Simplify, simplify, SIMPLIFY. Also, last night, I stopped writing. Although I still went to bed in the deep A.M hours. I hit the pillow after reading up to chapter 10 of The Catcher in the Rye, which I think I’m going to have to admit, has replaced The Great Gatsby as my favorite novel ever. I don’t know… maybe it’s selfish. I’m voyeur in Nick Carraway’s experience but I don’t know, there’s something about Holden Caufield that’s familiar. He’s sensual about life.
Anyway… Last night I was able to break away from the world I created but I missed it; it wants to built. But it wants to be built–RIGHT.
So, right now–I’m writing at a safe pace. I’m still striving for my release dates but that’s secondary to making sure I give the world time to fully form in my head.
And so my final words before I hit the hay at 3:30 AM… Well, maybe 3:40 AM — it’s 3:30 now.
I know my readers are going to appreciate this slow down… because in the end, a weak plot will only disappoint them… and um, seriously… I don’t like disappointing people.
I mean, morning…
Sorry again for the typos… my eyes feel like there’s sand in them….
Now it’s 3:31 AM
It’s 10:05AM in the new day…
I couldn’t sleep after I woke up at 9:30a–lots going through my head.
So, I think I got 6 hours. That’s good enough. My head is hurting a little though. But I’m wired in the head. Can’t sleep.
Here’s my late morning update. I’ve officially DELETED from page 33 -142…
A week and half of work now lives in the land of erase.
Not sweating it… just moving forward and finally knowing where I’m going…
Time to write.